My lalalalalalalas.....


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Friday, August 29, 2008

An Elephant Named Guilt


Has anyone ever met the Elephant named Guilt? I have!! His favorite places to sit are on the shoulders, and the heart. One of his favorite things to do it remind you of many things that you have done wrong, whether it be the past or the present. The only way you can get him to leave is by saying out loud (usually to another person) what he keeps reminding you of. Then usually he will step down.

****When I was in the 5Th grade, I did something that I still feel bad about today. Now it was nothing of a great magnitude, it was small and petty but to this day I can not forget it. I didn't physically hurt anyone or myself for that matter. But I did not stand up when I knew I was in the wrong about something. I will now tell everyone what I did.....I was in the class and everyone was signing a "get well" card for another fellow classmate who had been out. When the card was passed to me, I noticed that the boy sitting behind me did not sign his name. So I took it upon myself to write a little note for him in a RED pen and this is what it said: Dear Jessica, I hope you get well soon! Love William.......And that was it...William had noticed that someone had written his name on the card with out asking him and got really upset. He then proceeded to scratch out what had been written with black pen, leaving a huge black blob of ink on a really nice card. After the card finished going around the class room, the teacher took the card and immediately asked who scratched out the note. William told the teacher that he did not want to write anything on there and so he scratched out what SOMEONE had written down for him. Because I sat right in front of him she knew that it had to be one of 4 of us all sitting at the same table. She asked who had the RED pen. When no one but me had the red pen I knew I was going to be in trouble. She had said to our little group that who ever it was, was going to get a detention and have to stay after and talk to her. I knew I could not have that....a detention was like going to jail for me...it meant that I would have a record. So in that moment I very nicely ask the teacher if I could go to the bathroom. In which I took the RED pen to the bathroom with me and threw it in the garbage , now there would be no traces leading back to me. To this day I know that the teacher knew it was me and was hoping that I would fess up and tell her it was me. But I never did. And so to this day I still feel bad!

**** OK so there, its out there and if there was ever a way that I could go back and apologize for writing that note on that card with that red pen, I would. I am sorry to William and I am sorry to my 5Th grade teacher, Ms. D!

****Now for the real reason for all of this.....Stephenie Meyer had planned to write the book Twilight from Edwards Perspective calling it Midnight Sun! Well after Stephenie so trustingly lent out her unfinished Midnight Sun transcripts, someone has gone out there and posted them on the Internet. She is now considering not finishing the book, and as of right now it is on hold indefinitely. She has been betrayed by someone she has trusted and now we might not get a great book because of them. I hope for that persons sake that they feel the Guilt and comes forward and apologizes.

8 comments:

Lesley said...

Oh! Little-Mandy sounds so cute! What you did was nice, even if it was misguided. And sneaking away to throw the pen in the garbage is just plain adorable. :) So thanks for sharing, and try not to beat yourself up anymore about it. :)

But what that person did to Meyer is so awful! How could someone feel okay about doing such a thing? Seriously. I hope it all gets aired out and that Meyer can continue to give fans what she wants to, without mean people getting in the way.

James, Cameo, Jacob, and Eli said...

It's amazing how powerful guilt can be and how long lasting!! But if that's all that is making you feel guilty, you should be pretty proud of yourself!! As for the book, I'm with you, I sure hope that person can really feel and understand what he/she has done and work to repair it - hopefully it turns out well in the end.

amy hunter said...

loved the fifth grade story! you're so cute and we need to chat so I plan on calling you this week because I miss you!

amy hunter said...

love the fifth grade story! you are so cute and we need to chat so I am going to call you this week because I miss you!

amy hunter said...

love the fifth grade story! you are so cute and we need to chat so I am going to call you this week because I miss you!

amy hunter said...

love the fifth grade story! you are so cute and we need to chat so I am going to call you this week because I miss you!

amy hunter said...

ok so I just realized that you have to approve comments...so sorry about sending the same comment several times! yeah I'm a dork!

Summer said...

That's a really funny story actually! I too am very sad that Stephanie's new book might never be finished...or worse...published! Hopefully things will get worked out! It's nice to see your blog!

-Summer